PRICE OF MARRIAGE:
As a man, after you have got yours and your partner’s parents consent, they (the bride’s parents) will require you to pay something, usually in cash or kind. The Bible calls this dowry (Gen 34:12) “Ask me never so much dowry and gift, and I will give according as ye shall say unto me: but give me the damsel to wife.”
Genesis 34:12 KJV
The custom of paying dowry is as old as the world 🌎 itself. You MUST be prepared to pay 💰 the bride 👰 price. Sometimes they ask for money and at other times they ask for other things that are not monetary. Dowry varies from culture to culture.
Let’s take a look 👀 at the account of Jacob in Genesis 29:18-20:“And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter. And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me. And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.”
Genesis 29:18-20 KJV
This is dowry. Seven years of hard labour. It would have been easier if they had told him to pay money 💰. But he had to pay in a non-monetary form.
Genesis 34:11-12:“And Shechem said unto her father and unto her brethren, Let me find grace in your eyes, and what ye shall say unto me I will give. Ask me never so much dowry and gift, and I will give according as ye shall say unto me: but give me the damsel to wife.”
Genesis 34:11-12 KJV
That is a man who really wanted to get married. He said he will pay 💰 whatever the bride 👰 price was.
You should prepare your mind that whatever is demanded, provided it is Scriptural and reasonable, you will pay. Do not allow the demand of bride’s parents to scare you.
David wanted to get married and Saul demanded for a dowry. I Samuel 18:20-25 records:
“And Michal Saul’s daughter loved David: and they told Saul, and the thing pleased him. And Saul said, I will give him her, that she may be a snare to him, and that the hand of the Philistines may be against him. Wherefore Saul said to David, Thou shalt this day be my son in law in the one of the twain. And Saul commanded his servants, saying, Commune with David secretly, and say, Behold, the king hath delight in thee, and all his servants love thee: now therefore be the king’s son in law. And Saul’s servants spake those words in the ears of David. And David said, Seemeth it to you a light thing to be a king’s son in law, seeing that I am a poor man, and lightly esteemed? And the servants of Saul told him, saying, On this manner spake David. And Saul said, Thus shall ye say to David, The king desireth not any dowry, but an hundred foreskins of the Philistines, to be avenged of the king’s enemies. But Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines.”
1 Samuel 18:20-25 KJV
You think this demand is high, don’t you? But David went ahead and brought what Saul wanted.
This is the point I am driving home. When you go to ask for a lady’s hand in marriage, bear it in mind that her parents are going to ask for a dowry and you must pay it. If it is too high, you can bargain with her family, and where they prove difficult, you can commit it to God in prayer 🙏. But don’t be scared 😱. If they ask for something that you know is unscriptural, prayerfully and respectfully decline.
The injunction in 1 Corinthians 10:31-33:
“Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. Give none offence, neither to the Jews, nor to the Gentiles, nor to the church of God: Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved.”
1 Corinthians 10:31-33 KJV will be helpful here.
We have three groups of people referred to in this Scripture. They are the Church, the Gentiles and the Jews. You MUST not deliberately offend your relatives, your partner’s relatives, or the Church. A man or woman who wants to marry is dealing with these groups of people. Much as you MUST not deliberately offend any of the three, you MUST obey God. You MUST not compromise your Faith as such a time. You MUST be able to say firmly, like the disciples, “Then Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men.”
Acts 5:29 KJV
And if you run into any difficulty, you must seek the counsel and help of your pastor and other elders in the church.
After settling the dowry you don’t need to waste time delaying the wedding ceremony. In most cases in the Bible, dowry and wedding 👰 closely go together. Unnecessary delay may cause problems. Samson’s experience in Judges 14:10-20 show this:
“So his father went down unto the woman: and Samson made there a feast; for so used the young men to do. And it came to pass, when they saw him, that they brought thirty companions to be with him. And Samson said unto them, I will now put forth a riddle unto you: if ye can certainly declare it me within the seven days of the feast, and find it out, then I will give you thirty sheets and thirty change of garments: But if ye cannot declare it me, then shall ye give me thirty sheets and thirty change of garments. And they said unto him, Put forth thy riddle, that we may hear it. And he said unto them, Out of the eater came forth meat, and out of the strong came forth sweetness. And they could not in three days expound the riddle. And it came to pass on the seventh day, that they said unto Samson’s wife, Entice thy husband, that he may declare unto us the riddle, lest we burn thee and thy father’s house with fire: have ye called us to take that we have? is it not so? And Samson’s wife wept before him, and said, Thou dost but hate me, and lovest me not: thou hast put forth a riddle unto the children of my people, and hast not told it me. And he said unto her, Behold, I have not told it my father nor my mother, and shall I tell it thee? And she wept before him the seven days, while their feast lasted: and it came to pass on the seventh day, that he told her, because she lay sore upon him: and she told the riddle to the children of her people. And the men of the city said unto him on the seventh day before the sun went down, What is sweeter than honey? and what is stronger than a lion? And he said unto them, If ye had not plowed with my heifer, ye had not found out my riddle. And the Spirit of the LORD came upon him, and he went down to Ashkelon, and slew thirty men of them, and took their spoil, and gave change of garments unto them which expounded the riddle. And his anger was kindled, and he went up to his father’s house. But Samson’s wife was given to his companion, whom he had used as his friend.”
Judges 14:10-20 KJV
Samson paid the dowry of a Philistine lady but delayed in taking the lady in as his wife. And the result was that ” Samson’s wife was given to his companion, whom he had used as his friend”
Make up your mind to please God only not man. Elaborate wedding 👰 sometimes is to please men. Be Wise.
May the LORD give us a Godly homes 🏡 in JESUS Mighty Name Amen 🙏.
See you in 2017 if our LORD JESUS CHRIST delays in HIS coming.
May God help us to remain rapturable in this last month of the year and not be lost in carelessness in Jesus Mighty name. Amen 🙏
Mrs Angelinah Olubunmi Peters
JESUS Is Alive In me