Growing up, my parents did all they could to ensure I never devalued myself or saw myself as sub-par. Unfortunately, the saying “you can take a horse to the river, but you can’t make it drink”, was applicable for me when I got to secondary school. My first Secondary school was a whole new ball game for me: first time living away from home, first time living in Nigeria, first time having to do practically everything for myself – so of course a new self evaluation was due. When I couldn’t do things that everyone else seemed to be able to do easily – and then was teased (I say teased to put it lightly) – the window for self devaluation flung wide open and for the first time in my life I began to doubt myself and I didn’t have my family around to dispel those doubts.
Low self-esteem is a terrible thing I tell you, most especially if you’re an introvert as I was back then. I’d just write all my emotions in my little Hello Kitty Diary and bottle my worries and perfected my “I’m fine” to the last decibel, up to the point that even I started to believe it – but I was far from it.
I was lucky – my family are very discerning and when I returned home they were able to see past my façade and crack me open to begin reparative work on my self-esteem before it became too late for me – but not everyone has that opportunity. Some people go through their entire lives and never get a chance to achieve self- actualization: being able to know who you are and accept yourself fully.
My advice: be proud of yourself. Bask in your strengths and accept your flaws that you cannot change. Side note: this isn’t a free pass to continue with attitudes that you know don’t work for your good! But on a whole, get to know more about yourself and accept yourself because that is the first step on the route to building a strong and healthy self-esteem.
Be proud of yourself – #IamProud
Self – Esteem – Part of the TriotiNaija #IamProud campaign
