Hi, it’s me again, yeah Gloria. It’s another Monday so butterflies are you ready??!! Ok that was a lirru beet exuberant. As y’all know, I’m a fan of twitterNG, there’s absolutely no personality that you won’t find there, y’all will agree with me that humans are the most interesting things to study, I mean you never get tired of trying to figure out their antics, I think psychologists are real lucky that they get to do it as a job, it has got to be an interesting one. Today I’m going to talk (pardon me, write) about an interesting thread and an equally interesting story I found there. Oh and I would like your opinion on the previous article, thanks.
Someone started a thread on the most difficult cooking experiences for guys, see guys coming out to lament their kitchen woes, one was like he doesn’t get the amount of salt to put in his scrambled egg, it either comes out salty or eggy ha! Another was like he doesn’t like the get this “potopoto” (for non-Yoruba that means mud) splash the pepper makes when it is being fried, yet another says his fried fishes always come out in broken pieces, another is bothered about the splashing of the hot oil when he’s frying stuff, I was laughing my gut out when a conspiracy theory developed in my head, I’ll share it with you, humour me for a second, will you? You know those people that made the world the patriarchal society that some of us are trying to change today, yeah, those forefathers that gave unwritten rules and sturvs, they’re scammers. You know how boys would love to play in the outdoors alone, these forefathers probably scammed their foremothers into thinking the outdoors was a dangerous place to be, told them they were stronger and by proxy, the braver of the lot, so they should be the ones to face these dangers while the women stayed indoors and cooked whatever the men brought in.
You know why they did this? I’ll tell you why, they knew something the women didn’t, the kitchen was just as dangerous but not quite as adventurous as the outdoors! You tell me trying to fry chicken isn’t a dangerous task or cooking ordinary rice (my aunt has a scalded wrist that she got from the steam emanating from jollof rice) or peeling yams that itch you like crazy when they touch your skin, it is dangerous but not as interesting as shooting a deer (beautiful things that they are) or an elephant, that’s why I think the forefathers are scammers. So they passed it down from generation to generation until women decided they too wanted in on the adventures too, which has changed from hunting things to politics, finance, engineering and a whole lot of other stuff, hence the rise of the age of feminism, lol. It’s just my conspiracy theory though, I hope you enjoyed it.
If you follow joroolumofin on instagram or subdeliveryman on twitter you should have read what I want to share next; so this guy ditched his girlfriend of about 6 years and later fell in love and proposed to a 22year old in just 4 months; now as an objective party I’d like to analyse his explanation, shall we:
• He basically said she supported him in every way, when he became orphaned, her family helped support him and pay his rent and education, I’m inferring from this that they had already started dating before he was orphaned and the family knew about it well enough to help get him on his feet, so it wasn’t a secret affair.
• She got pregnant four times and had abortions four times with his knowledge, meaning that there’s a very great chance he didn’t see himself ending up with her in the long run
• As time went on, he fell out of love for her (one day we’re going to talk about this falling business) and started seeing her more as a sister or friend but did not tell her until she was 30years old (I guess he conveniently forgot because he didn’t want to lose favour with her parents who were paying his way through school)
• He saw a younger person whom he felt sparks with (I hope none of the sparks entered his eye) and proposed just four month after breaking up with the 30 year old he used as a stepping stone.
Do you believe in karma, ’cause I sure as heck do, basically this guy fed on the unsuspecting (and dare I say a little bit dense) sist-ur like a parasite and as soon as he got what he wanted he realized that oh, she’s not the one for me and then drops her like a worn out pair of gloves because he believes he won’t be happy in a marriage with her. My question is why didn’t he tell her that earlier, in the first, second, third, heck fourth year, instead, he squandered six years of another human’s life, there is no other word for it, this is inhumane, I don’t care if it’s a male or female, it is not nice.
This gives a whole new level to #wasteher/histime2016, my bruv is the chief of opportunistic infections, the worst kind. Anyways as the story goes, she curses him, I for one am a Yoruba girl, I do believe people can be cursed, call me superstitious, it’s part of what makes me African. Even if you don’t believe in hogwash like curses you gotta believe in that law of physics that states ‘to every action, there’s an equal but opposite reaction’ which I’ll translate for you baby, it means karma is the female version of a dog (I’m not permitted to use that kind of language here lol). Turns out the bruv also believes strongly in curses, now he’s scared for his life, duh, you should have thought of that before promising the world to someone for 6years only to give them a plastic earth globe. Now of course, twitterNG reacted, in my opinion, I think we made it more of a boy.vs.girl fight with some people coming up with stories of girls that had done much worse.
Life wasn’t made as a boy against girl battle, we were made to complement each other not head butt each other at every turn, it seems what we mostly do these days is fight, we fight to be just as relevant, if not more, than our opposite gender. The way I see it is we’re first and foremost all God’s children, second we’re humans, be it a male human or a female human but a human nonetheless, the sooner we start realizing that we’re not so different from each other and instead of fighting tooth and nail to be lord over another is the day we both start winning the battle of the sexes.
What he did was wrong, if it was a female that did the same, it would still be wrong, it will always be wrong. I believe this actually calls for a whole new post on its own (or I’d write about why feminism is a form of humanism, sounds tough doesn’t it?), well amma do that later, ciao.