Have you ever felt so emotionally beaten down it started to take a toll on your physical well-being? Ever felt like screaming “why me?” but never getting an answer?
Ever felt like injustice had its terrifyingly strong grip around your neck and all you can do is hang limp and wait for a chance to breathe?
Let me tell you something, it sucks.
Having a series of allegations thrown at you but what’s worse, is when they are thrown at your family because of you, that agony of being the cause of the raining of insults upon your loved ones who have sacrificed countlessly for you; it actually cannot be described. Just know that there is no pain like it.
The worst thing about injustice is that feeling of helplessness, feeling limp, feeling like the ultimate victim because there seems to be absolutely nothing you can do to change the situation. It’s like being a boxer’s punching bag, after each punch it still swings right back to it’s offender as though everything including gravity itself is against it.
You question everything and everyone because the pain you’re carrying is heavy enough as it is and you’re not looking to add any more by trusting the wrong people only for them to fail you; so you withhold your trust altogether – better safe than sorry.
The question now is – does it get better? Will you trust again? Will injustice lose its grip on you?
My lovelies, the answers lies within you. You definitely cannot do it alone so you need to open up to God totally. You can’t sit there praying for terror to rain on the people that caused you pain; that won’t solve your problems – the issue at hand is your happiness and peace, not vengeance. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that seeing the opposition punished will bring your happiness back, all you will feel at the end is emptiness.
Believe me when I say, I know.
What you need to do is to ask God to grant you inner peace; to shatter the power that intensifies injustice’s grip on you, and give you back your happiness – let that be your prayer. Don’t let religiosity steal your chance to be healed either; if you have a role in the church that takes up your concentration do not be ashamed to ask for some time to be relieved of your duties in order for your full healing to be achieved. You wouldn’t want to be the person that guides multitudes to salvation but you yourself then miss out – God forbid. Refuse to be a door, choose rather to be a tour guide; be
the person in front leading the way.
That being said, you can’t lead the way if your vision is clouded; you can’t be disoriented by the pain of unforgiveness and the hurt of betrayal, so it still goes back to taking time to heal, have several deep discussions with God and let Him give you all the closure you need to move on with a happy, joyful life.
It does get better.
Love,
ETP xo